Your best friend from the first grade
Your best friend from the first grade
Everyone in this world are friends. We all have lots of friends. Out of all these, the one which is very close to us, is our best friend. Friendship is the very precious gift which is given to us by god. A best friend is the one: who is always there with us in our bad time, always helps us in time of need. My best friends name is Sonal. She is my childhood friend. We meet eachother in first grade. We use to do homework together, go for lunch together and play together. She is the one with whom I can shared all my taught. For example: I told her about my boyfriend and our relationship. She is also the one whom I can trust. So, best friend is the most important person in our life.
posted by PRIYA @ 6:01 PM
1 Comments:
You write well about friendship in general. You get to the essence of friendship when you write about how friendship is especially important in a time of need. Sonal seems like an excellent friend.
However, you do not help me see your friend Sonal. You write about her importance, but you don't tell me what she looks like, sounds like, what kind of person she is. Also, you have some trouble with past tense. For example, "We use to do homework together, go for lunch together and play together." It should be used to, and it indicates past tense. Correcting this error would make your very good parallel construction even better.
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